the Frankenstein Jerk

Legacy of the 5-7-5 nightmare

Haiku: an elegant and immediate form of poetry, its roots placed in pre-Buddhist literature or chants beyond four hundred years ago. A form, steeped primarily in pastoral beauty and simplicity.

…Don’t know another way (at this time) to adequately describe the results of the majority of current “haiku” (haiku-type) “poetry.” “Lately” being only a basic, convenient time-placement for those who would endeavor to become accomplished “ku-ists.”  For in actuality, the western interpretation and clunky attempts at reconstructing, the poetry style similar to or miming haiku has been around ever since the early 1900’s with the Imagist movement.

   Ginsberg attempted to redefine the form most fitting the westernized speech patterns as “American sentences.” And if having the reader of any poem, feel comfortable while reading, is your goal, this might be a good interpretation to embrace.

   If, while reading a properly translated version of Buson, Shiki, Issa, Basho’s works, one will readily note: the proper western translation does not follow the archaic mumbo-jumbo of 5-7-5 syllables (or sound units.) Folks, that’s because western speech patterns are not Japanese. It takes a westerner less space if written, less energy and sound units if spoken to incorporate more variations and sound functions. We use conjunctions, prepositions…even contractions to humanize our communication. To delete these most common forms of grammar (a difficult accomplishment at best) leaves one’s “haiku” with the awkward feel of—well, Frankenstein doing the jerk. And it ain’t pretty.

Traditional seventeen syllable “haiku” is a great disciplinary medium for cutting away the excess verbiage in a piece of work. But enuff is enuff, Grasshopper. After the globs of extra fat are whacked away, the final result, one would assume, is to end up with a short, concise, flowing “poem” that is easily understood, relevant to, and feels conversational. Maybe, even regional…?

Notice, the word “relevance” in the preceding paragraph? Contemplate that for a while, Grasshopper. Relevence.

   If one has access to a decent translation with historical reference (Jane Reichhold’s, Basho the complete haiku, is a primo example) of Japanese historic haiku—it will become self- evident, why most readers respond: Haiku? Oh, ya. Read that once… Relevance. Much of what is historically written, is only relevant to that period in time, to what is happening to writers and readers, at that time. (A beneficial hint: while writing, using current events, terminology that is borderline gittchy, euphemisms, slang, etc…in a very short while, no one will know or care what you are writing about. Your works will be quickly outdated and relegated to: oh ya, read that once…)

   Written communication can transcend time periods, but must be written in such a way as to provide a perspective that will be relevant to any time period in the future. No small task.

Max tdc

writing poetry that will make the grade…

…More Guano

You’ve probably wondered why there is such a vast difference in the writing quality from magazine to magazine—it seems to boil down to two basic components: a.) the “editor’s” likes and dislikes; the “editor’s” level of poetry understanding (assuming no management input.) b.) the sphere of readers for any given publication; a tricky balancing act, satisfying the requirements of management and advertisers’ pressure vs. a readership exhibiting even the slightest amount of intellect and from a basic understanding to intense poetic understanding and desire for fresh, well written works.

Upping the odds of writing top-show poetry…

In another life, in a galaxy far, far away, the ol’ ticky-dot-cat was a custom motorcycle and hotrod fabricator. Early on, I learned of limited “talents” which allowed me to show best in design, mechanics and machining—and on the other end of the project it turns out I was a hot-dawg pinstriper and letterer. Body man and painter—nope. No way. I just wielded a mean dagger brush and One Shot paint.

Yet, it’s the unheralded body work and of course the overall paint job that shows off the best of a classy ride. The paint job is the first noticed and most admired on an automotive creation—the rest is all simply: that’s cool too…

Let’s apply the Zen of the hotrod paint job to the writing of a good piece of top-show “poetry.”

The color must match the style of the creation, the soul of the vehicle no hot-bippity neon pink on a gangsta whip nor Imron death-mist black lacquer on the Ringling Bros. clown car.

Good prep is essential: not cleaned, sanded and well rubbed down will leave “hickeys” and “assh_les” (dark pigment spots and those little ringed sucker marks) in the finish.

Paint must be applied smoothly and evenly over the entire project. Thin spots look un-thought out and careless. Too much paint will run and sag from its own weight.

Time spent on the details, in the tight and usually unnoticed spots such as at molding and behind racks or bumpers, at light and ornament bezels transmit a feeling of professionalism, of being a complete presentation of image. Never assume the viewer will not notice if these details are incorrect or poorly finished.

Final rub-down and detailing, projects an air of self-confidence, pride in accomplishment; putting the viewer at ease and subconsciously inviting them to enjoy the basic construction, appreciate the innovative implementations and nuances of any hotrod custom.

Paint on—ol’ Max the paint slinger…

Guano Dribblings…

Wrasslin’ with submittals for our humble little publication, Cheap Seats Ticket to Ride, we “editors” come again and again to the conundrum: what is poetry? What is currently acceptable, accessible, pleasing in rhythm to the ear and presentation to the eye? Tactile, ephemeral, esoteric subject matter? This could become quite a list…

Those who blithely profess to be “poets” or those who have the so called “ability” by virtue of  academically bestowed laurels (bestowed by those who wouldn’t know a couplet from a wood louse) to adjudicate others’ “poetism” will claim: poetry is what the writer wants it to be—no rules, no criteria, whatever dribbles from the inky end of a pen. Well, this just sounds like so much lazy socialist manure…and yet, indeed, it must be considered, because there is (in other than the pointless, frustrated rantings and wailings of poetry societies) no guidelines for what is, acceptable writing—what is truly “poetry.” Sure glad there’s a level of competence required for my plumber…

So…writing “poetry” ends up being a wandering, ego-stroke, pass-time of no apparent value; which it has obviously shown itself to be, more and more over these last many decades.

To rise above the hemorrhoidal discomfort of sloppy writing, the acceptance model of any chicken scratchings as “poetry”—and publication by most (unqualified) ‘zines of any and all of these guano dribblings that flow into their mail box?…stay tuned and we’ll explore the becoming of an accepted, real-deal poetry student.

Max tdc

Slip-Note Seasoning

Late night, relaxed with Lucky-cat; Mtn. Dew and seasoned nori stips—nori for both. Luck’ loves it. Nothing on the television—can always count on PBS…A fund raiser featuring a montage of Glen Campbell’s music career; focusing primarily on the ’68-’72 Glen Campbell Goodtime Hour. Sit back, heavy eye-lids, and relive…

In one particular segment, a duo with Ray Charles: Charles playing a country piece, resorts to that old Floyd Cramer specialty, the country piano slip-note. (Off-key notes slipped in, building [bridging back] to the key line—hey, cannot read a note of music, that’s the best explanation I can scrape together.) Those occasional bright, slip-note embellishments “color points” enliven just about any, otherwise fairly white-bread score, with ease, and without overt frosting.

Mentally reviewing the “poetry,” this old fuzzy grey-matter will recall: I begin to connect a few poems that stand out with those country slip-note piano riffs. Those verse writings with the unexpected, yet appropriately applied “color points” seem to be the most recallable—to me the most enjoyable.

“Color points:” Not necessarily spectrum based, would be written embellishments, 

not slavishly added adverbs and adjectives! sparkles that allow the piece to pop, draw it from the ordinary flat-line construction and allow it to stand a bit more enchantingly proud.

Why: ”bang” instead of “crash, throb, thwack, wallop, thunder.”

Why: “red” instead of “vermillion, rubine, cinnamon; “green” instead of “tart-apple, new, spring, leaf-green…” Note: flowers of red, yellow and blue (not only a really—really boring description, do not exist as such—except in lazy writing.) “Red, yellow and blue” are actually (“primary”) color categories; citrine, mauve, turquoise…are the descriptive touches that make a piece jump up and say howdy!

   As long as the sound, texture, smell or color descriptive is an appropriate one or applied in a metaphorically sound manner, it will succeed. Example, a color: let’s say “xanthos,” can indeed screech into ones face or cause one’s teeth to grate. “Blush” allows one to relax, use imagination.

   For another time: proper grammar. But just a short dash, here:—proper word use, usage that exhibits (see: could’ve used “shows”) a modicum of intellectual application. “Pleaded”—WTF is this! The more appropriate usage would be “pled.” Pled” has been the mainstay for centuries. Just because some stacked blond bimbo news anchor is an idiot and thinks “pleaded” is ok…don’t get sucked in. Yes, “pleaded” is colloquially used by the post-literate masses drooling along Broadway—but the key is, post-literate.

Is it then correct to use ”bleeded, treaded, feeded”? A few others: who, whom, lie, lay, laid and lain. Just a bit of introspective forethought can elevate a commonly acceptable piece without jamming it up into the avoid-at-any-cost “academic drivel” category.

Enuff for today. Write well…and I does mean, well.  Max tdc