Racing on the Inside

Down the Final Stretch…

Next Cheap Seats is almost ready for the printer…

Lately, as we are striving to put this next issue to ink—

it becomes a little difficult to put together these simple

editions of Cheap Seats Ticket to Ride.

Because of flagging interest on behalf of the editors?

one may query.—Nope.

Because of the writing quality of submitters?

Ab-so-lutely, Nope. (In fact, for the most part, our authors

are top notch!) Pause…

Inhale…exhale big blue cloud of cigar smoke.

Got your attention?

“Difficult,” may in-fact be not quite the correct word.

Let’s try, “disheartening”…?

Mmmmm. That’s better. Disheartening.

We receive some of the very best, interesting, thought

provoking even humorous pieces…which, due to our

format dimensions and set-up process (fully explained

in each issue on the grass-green insert at issue’s end—

“grass-green” having a whole different meaning in the

state of the Colorado Rocky Mtn. High) due to these

constraints and respect for our writer’s intents we must

set aside these gems and all we can do is sigh…sigh

Apparently, writers of this fine “poetry” have trouble

with spacial properties. Perhaps, they are unable to locate

a scale or ruler in order to verify maximum dimensions?

before, then, finalizing and posting with some of the

koolist assortment of Postal stamps one could imagine…

Disappointing, to be certain.

We receive:  “poems” 7”, 8”, 9” in length—it’s six (6”) max.

dear ones (6-3/8” at the absolute maximum, if that extra

three-eights inch is the bitter solution)—we get double wides,

fatties, Perdomo Cuban Parejo’s! Most of these big smokes

we enjoy, but must leave on the cutting room floor along

with the wilted tobacco leaves and scattered bands…

they are over 2-5/8 inches wide! (Again, we can

accommodate up to 2-7/8” if the situation is do-or-die.

But that’s it.

Cheap Seats does not scan your works into the devil’s

machine in order to match fonts and compose our format.

We do not edit your pieces for line spacing and wraps.

(If you are not familiar with these terms, please,

check ‘em out.) Hint: Learn how to line-break properly.

If the piece is too long, we don’t continue them on a second

page—this just flattens the energy and thought flow.

If the “poem” is too wide, even just a bit over the

max-max and we try to squoze it in—the side trimming

(paper cutting) process may give it a hair-cut; heavy on

the top, close over the ears; leaving some, probably the

most salient parts—on the barber’s floor.

At Cheap Seats:

your “poems” are cut (as with scissors) and pasted (as

with rubber cement) vertical arrangement (only) onto

a template, and then the template is sent to the printer…

There is no alteration or changing of your works. Works

are laid-out vertically never rotated horizontally.

What will be seen and read in the paper and ink version,

is the same as was presented to our ham-fisted editors.

Postus Scriptus:

There are publications out there with similar, or equally

confusing guidelines…it’s a conspiracy…

Ol’ Max the ticky dot cat will address these processes in an

upcoming post. Perhaps these will also help you in getting

your work to ink. Will be back, hopefully, soon…

Good writing to you,

Max tdc